Teacher-Student Jokes

Teacher:"What is your name?".
Student:"Mera naam Suraj Prakash hai."
Teacher:"When I ask a question in English, answer it in english."
Student:"My name is Sunlight.

Teacher: What happened in 1869?
Student:Gandhi ji was born.
Teacher :What happened in 1873?
Student:Gandhiji was four years old.

Question:What is the fullform of maths.
Answer: Mentally affected teachers harassing students.

Teacher : Now children , if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped.
him then what virtue would I be showing ?
Student : BROTHERLY LOVE

Teacher :Because of Gandhiji's hard work what do we get on 15th August.
Student:A holiday

Teacher :Tomorrow there will be a lecture on Sun.Everyone must attend it.
Raju:No ma'm! I will not be able to attend it.
Teacher :Why?
Raju:My mother will not allow me to go so far!!!

Teacher:"Can anyone give me an example of Coincidence? "
Johnny:"Sir, my mother and father got married on the same day same time."

Teacher: How old is ur father.
Sunny:As old as I am.
Teacher:How is it possible?
Sunny:He became father only after I was born. (1st Rank)

Nice Jokes Contd...

Period

The kindergarten class had a homework assignment to find out about
something exciting and relate it to the class the next day.

When the time came for the little kids to give their reports, the
teacher was calling on them one at a time. She was reluctant to call
upon little Johnnie, knowing that he sometimes could be a bit crude. But
eventually his turn came.

Little Johnnie walked up to the front of the class, and with a piece of
chalk, made a small white dot on the blackboard, then sat back down.
Well the teacher couldn't figure out what Johnnie had in mind for his
report on something exciting, so she asked him just what that was.

"It's a period" reported Johnnie. "Well I can see that," she said, "but
what is so exciting about a period."

"Damned if I know" said Johnnie, "but this morning my sister said she
missed one. Then Daddy had a heart attack, Mommy fainted and the man
next door shot himself."

Two Santas, ? Brains?

Two santas rented a boat and fished in a lake every day. One day they
caught 30 fish. One santa said to his friend, "Mark this spot so that we
can come back here again tomorrow."
The next day, when they were driving to rent the boat, the same santa
asked his friend, "Did you mark that spot?"
His friend replied, "Yeah, I put a big 'X' on the bottom of the boat."
The first one said, "You stupid fool! What if we don't get that same
boat today!?!?"

Heart Attack

Teacher: Johnny, if your father earned $100.00
and gave half of it to your mother, what would she have?
Little Johnny: A heart attack!